The next couple weeks were full of appointments, worrying, and uncertainty. No one could give us an exact answer as to what was going on—would everything be fine or would I need surgery? All I wanted to know was if my baby was going to be OK; if I was going to be OK.
Because of the possible ectopic pregnancy, we got sent to the hospital’s free OB/GYN clinic until we could figure out what was going on. The nurses and doctors there treated me like crap. They viewed me as a stupid teenager with no future who didn’t know how to use a condom. They looked at my mother, being 16 years older than me, with a look as if saying “Ah, it all makes sense now.” They were horrible.
Two weeks we waited, longing to know what the answer was going to be. Mikel and I didn’t go to work; we didn’t leave the house other than to go to the appointments. My mom was stressed to the max with worry and fear for us, but she did a good job hiding it.
When I was 5 weeks along we went for yet another ultrasound. Panicked and worried we waited silently for the ultrasound tech to say something to at least hint at what the outcome might be….but nothing.
“If you want to go take a seat in the waiting room, I’ll just type up your appointment summary.” Oh my god we might actually find something out!
That had to be the longest 10 or 15 minutes of my life.
When the woman came back out I could feel my heart racing. Looking at her hand and seeing the folded piece of paper, I didn’t know whether to be excited or scared. Just give me the piece of paper so I can read it and we can leave. Taking a deep breath I opened the folded paper and frantically skimmed trying to find something useful.
“…able to see the fetus in patient’s uterus….unable to find a fetal pole or yolk sack…”
What the hell does that mean?! That wasn’t really useful at all. So of course, I called my mom and told her, hoping she would be able to shed some knowledge.
“Let’s just see what the doctor has to say at your appointment later.” Yay. More waiting.
At the clinic, the doctor was AWFUL to me! I was told that one of the reasons they couldn’t see a lot in the ultrasound was because I had a lot of gas backed up. Which really sucked! But it’s not like it was something I had any control over.
Well, this doctor was such a bitch to me that she literally, some how, made me feel bad for not being able to fart. HOW DOES SOMEONE DO THAT?! No clue. But she did it. Somehow, some way.
Throughout this one appointment with her, she managed to insult and embarrass me, look down on my mother, judge the two of us and my boyfriend, and completely piss us all off. She hardly told us anything we didn’t already know and still didn’t give us an answer to the whole situation. The only thing useful that she did explain, was that a fetal pole and a yolk sack was VERY important!
She scheduled ANOTHER ultrasound for the following week. But at that one we could see the baby, see (not hear) the heartbeat, and got our first sonogram. 🙂 We FINALLY got the answer we had been waiting for!!!
princelesslife 